But how often do we hear the nitty-gritty of how we can actually better understand our deepest desires and most embarrassing questions? Bustle has enlisted Vanessa Marin, a sex therapist based in San Francisco, to help us out with the details. No gender, sexual orientation, or question is off limits, and all questions remain anonymous. Because even if you're already pretty great at it, there might be something more you can learn. I never really felt that confident about my hand job technique though. Any tips or advice for how to give a good one?

We know what you're thinking: Hand jobs are so ninth grade. We hear ya. And sometimes a handy may even be preferred. So now that we got the why out of the way, let's get right to the how…. Maintain Eye ContactTry to maintain eye contact throughout -- unless you're making out. Then we'll give you permission to close your eyes, so as not to creep your partner out.

Hands down, hand jobs have the potential to be the most stressful of all the sex acts. Unlike the mighty and powerful blow job , they are not something that only you can do for your partner unless he's really flexible, in which case, lucky lady! And the scene can often play out as awkward: There you are, halfheartedly jerking your hands in an attempt to create a pleasurable experience for your partner — one that he had down to a science by age Before you let a defeatist attitude keep you from trying, remember: a lot of men love getting hand jobs, just like how you probably like require some digital action, too.

Wondering how to give a handjob like a pro? When you add a top-notch handjob to your repertoire, he'll wonder what else you have up your sleeve. As a man, I've got solid tips sex tips on how to take your handjob skills to the next level.